"It doesn’t feel much like a birthday" Daniel said sadly on the day he turned 8 a couple of weeks ago.
He was right, and it broke my heart a little bit. With all the siblings on top of each other all the time I try to make birthdays really special and I felt like I had completely dropped the ball on this one. I hadn’t, actually, and I know full well that everyone else is struggling with lockdown birthdays too, but I still felt awful for him.
But you know what? We turned it around. (I may have wallowed a bit first!) Each of his grandparents called or FaceTimed to have a chat, and we had his choice of menu for each meal - waffles for breakfast; tomato soup for lunch; roast beef with French mustard, roast potatoes, and peas and broccoli (the latter because the RT dislikes peas and "I want everyone to enjoy my birthday") for dinner. Dinner ended up being rather late as, in true lockdown-discombobulation style, I completely forgot he had asked for chocolate soufflés for pudding until about ten minutes before we were due to eat. My trusty Mary Berry recipe book leaped to the rescue and the day was saved, with the soufflés declared better than his (not sure about that) and much hilarity when the centre of the soufflé turned out to be so hot that it melted the bottom of the candle I had stuck in it! He also opened the presents from those of us in the house (his brothers’ in the morning, ours and the RT’s in the evening), and by the time he went to bed he had completely cheered up.
The following Saturday we had his ‘party’, to tide him over until the promised proper one when it is safe to have it. He had requested a few party foods and we had discussed his cake requirements, but I refused to let him see any of it in progress so he wasn’t quite sure what was going to happen.
We started, as with every Saturday during lockdown, with online synagogue services. We have been joining a large synagogue in north London whose senior rabbi officiated at our wedding. The half hour Tots Shabbat before the main service is on Zoom, and a quick message to the rabbi got him a public shout out, followed by everyone singing Happy Birthday to him (always entertaining with internet lag) and yelling their good wishes. It was the first time Daniel had joined Adam and Ben in one of these sessions and he was blown away by the attention and how much people cared. He was glowing for hours afterwards!
After the services (a much-needed break for me after a late night baking), he was banned from the dining room and DH watched a movie with them while the RT and I got everything ready (RT had declared a willingness to do pretty much anything if it meant not having to watch the Emoji movie!). Daniel had no idea I had already got some of the Harry Potter themed party supplies we had talked about before lockdown, so a banner went up and a table cover and plates/cups/napkins went on the table.
The chocolate frog mould (which he knew about) came with six boxes and chocolate frog cards (which he didn’t) and the RT spent a couple of hours valiantly wrestling with the instructions for putting the awkwardly-shaped boxes together so that everyone got a box with frog and card on their plate. I had some biscuit stamps with the Hogwarts and house crests and the resultant massive biscuits came out beautifully. Then there was the cake, one of my best yet (dreading having to do it again for his post-lockdown party!) and lots of his favourite party food, a pile of presents from extended family, and as a final touch we put on his favourite song as we finally let him in.
He was blown away! Hugs all round, then zooming round the table exclaiming at everything, and as we sat around the table together munching and comparing chocolate frog cards and enjoying his rather eclectic taste in music, he kept saying thank you over and over again.
When we finished eating we made video calls to his grandparents so he could open their presents with them.
"I had a lovely party." Birthday restored :-)
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